Saturday, 14 May 2016

Update - the last two days

Well, were to begin?  At the beginning I think is probably best.

Yesterday I got up, did a few things and then went to get a slice of bread and butter for breakfast.  No bread, so I had crackers.  The butter though was so soft it was crazy.  I investigated.  The fridge had totally died.  Dead.  Not going and everything was warm.

I called Hubby and he said that he thought it had been like it all week...  We will not ask why he didn't think to tell me before.

So I went to our wonderful local shop that sells all kind of things including household appliances and bought a new one.   I know I could have tried to get the old one repaired, but I didn't.  Chosen, paid for and they delivered the new one on the same day and took the old one away.  The service was very good.  This might seem terrible and profligate, but it is what it is.

I came home and did a few things and then managed to fall through our back door into the lobby/laundry area over a step and onto a hard tiled floor and totally smashed my knee.  It has a big hole in it.

After recovering from that I started to empty the old fridge and removed all of the fridge magnets from the outside.  Some of them had sort of welded themselves to the fridge and I had to pry them off with a knife.  Just as well the fridge was going...

Then I managed to drop a set of ceramic spoons on the floor and smashed them.

I pretty much gave up after that!  Hubby came home in time to supervise the delivery of the new fridge - he can work from home - and we were back in business so I could go and get food for the week and for today.

To say that Friday the thirteenth was rubbish for me this year is an understatement!!!  Never have I had such a bad one before and I hope never to have a day like this again.

Then today was the big "family meeting" day about Man.  I got up and prepared food - thanks to the new fridge - and then waited for the arrival of Man and the other participants.

The meeting was ho hum to say the least.  Everyone was civil and polite - I feared they might not be - and apart from Man we were all on the same page that he definitely needs help.  The rest of the participants think that Man is better than we do, but they have made a huge step change so that is a good thing.

Man however, well, he was having none of anything.  Apparently he is fine....

The net outcome after some three hours I think of discussion was that he didn't agree to anything.  However, some things are - I hope - going to be pressed upon him even if he doesn't like them such as employing a gardener, increasing the cleaners hours and if we can, getting him to allow us to take up all the rugs he has about the house..

Replacing the 50 - 60 year old - really, I kid you not - stair carpet that is a major hazard and is worn out was totally refused.  We tried and tried to find out why, but we were just met with firm refusals to do anything other than to say that modern carpets aren't as good a quality...

So we ended up with a lot of stress over recent weeks that Hubby and I felt very much directed towards us, a not too stressful day in the end today, but with the outcome that nothing will really happen.

I am not sure if this is good or bad.  What we can now put to bed and settle in our own minds though is that we have definitely tried and the rest of the family know that too because they were there.  Also they have tried and as I said, that is a big change for them and that has helped us.

You can lead a horse to water, but as was said today - not by me - you cannot make it drink even if you throw it in the water!

Thank you so much for the support, prayers, good vibes and all of the other things.  I am sure that they helped me.  Whenever I send out requests for support I always feel it behind me and with loving hands on my shoulders.  I cannot explain it, other than I know somehow that it is there.  That is all down to you and all I can do is thank you, and thank you from the bottom of my heart I do.  My hand is on your shoulder too whenever you need it. 

That is it really!  Sorry to have been late with visiting the Five On Fridays but I have come round and seen you all just now.  Thank you for taking part.

I hope that some sort of normality will now return, but we will see.  I have learned that there is no such thing as normal and you just have to roll with things.  In the meantime I am keeping my leg up and rested to give me knee a chance to heal.  Sorry about the IG picture, I won't share anymore though or any of the actual injury, it isn't pretty!

Hope you have a good rest of the weekend!  Thank you all again!!!!!

Amy

43 comments:

  1. So glad the meeting was not as bad as you feared. You have done your best, that is all you can do. xx

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  2. What a lot of bad events for you on Friday the 13th. It sounds like the family meeting went better than expected. You have done your part.

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  3. Oh my you really had quite the Friday. Sorry things didn't resolve as well as they could at the meeting but glad you were able to get through it feeling support and getting your concerns out there. I hope you will relax with peace for the rest of the weekend. Hope your knee heals quickly.

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  4. My gosh, you have had the day from h**l. Hope your knee is ok. When our refrigerator went out I didn't want it repaired, I wanted a new one and it took a week. You're lucky you got one so soon. You've done all you can on the family situation. Think of it this way, if living like he does makes him happy, then accept that you're not going to change him.

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  5. I am very happy that you were able to just get a new fridge. Sorry about the loss of food. And much more to be sorry about like the banged up knee. The meeting seems to have gone better than you had hoped, but still not much forward progress. Maybe one that is not quite so civil is in order, if it pushes things along. Seems as if this family member wants to maintain as much control as possible, which is understandable on the one hand and not terribly wise on the other. It made me smile to read that you feel others' prayers and good thoughts for you and sense them as a steadying hand upon your shoulder.

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  6. You poor thing! That really was a day. Glad you got a new frig out of it, and made a tiny bit of progress with man. Hope you have a restful weekend and your knee feels better!

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  7. Hi Amy. sending good vibes your way and hoping for better days to come.

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  8. Luckily you didn't break any bones? 2 years ago I was weeding in a flowerbed, fell down and broke my wrist. 6 weeks cast... Resting and relaxation the whole day Amy !!!

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  9. Yikes what a day!

    Regarding meeting about the man. You know you did the best that you could. As you say you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink. I hope things work out.

    Take care of your knee! Don't overdo it when you have an injury. I 'sprained' my ankle, thought I'd hop right back on it and paid for it with two and a half years of pain and finally surgery. So take it easy.

    Hope the rest of your weekend is a little better!

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  10. Glad the meeting went better than you expected. It's a pity that he didn't want his carpet replacing or anything else but, as others have said, at least you know that you've tried. Your Friday 13th sounds like a real stinker. I hope your poor knee gets better soon. xx

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  11. Amy, I am so sorry Friday 13th turned out to be such an awful day for you but pleased that Saturday wasn't as bad as you had feared although it sounds as if you still have more battles to overcome. Hope the knee heals very soon. xx

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  12. Friday was not a good day, I hope your knee isn't giving you too much discomfort now.
    I'm glad the meeting wasn't as stressful as you thought it may be, I hope this is the start of something which is better for all.
    Lisa x

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  13. New fridges are more economical with power than old ones you have made the right choice, hope your knee heals up pretty soon, little baby steps with man are good, some change is better than none and now the family are getting involved fingers crossed it will take some of the stress off you :-)

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  14. I was reading that 2016 has only one Friday 13th. So hopefully the rest of your year will be much better.

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  15. Sounds like you had quite a rough patch and a stressfull time. You did your very best with the meeting and whatever the outcome you know you have tried to make things better for your relative. Now is the time to relax, take time out, enjoy your garden and get that knee better. Take carexx

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  16. Oh, nothing worse than fridge failure! You did the absolutely most sensible thing Amy: immediate replacement :) What good customer service too. The meeting was interesting, and I'm glad it was not so bad for you, even if frustrating too. I am not surprised by the total refusal to replace the rug - it is a major symptom of dementia to vigorously insist on keeping possessions unchanged, which can include clothing, and everything really. The fear of going into care is also about not wanting different surroundings. You have done so well even having the meeting, so take heart, bit by bit you will get there. xx

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  17. what a weekend x take care today and relax, you deserve xxx

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  18. What a frightful Friday and then a humdrum Saturday. Makes you wonder sometimes doesn't it? Hope 'something' comes from your meeting or at least a start. Take care.

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  19. Sorry to hear that you had a tough time with Friday 13th. Bad things are said to come in threes so you they’re out of the way. I think stubbornness comes with age, don’t take it out on yourselves. As for the saying ‘You can lead a horse to water, but as was said today - not by me - you cannot make it drink even if you throw it in the water!’ I used to think this about some of the pupils I tried to help teach. Hope your knee recovers soon.

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  20. Well, that was a Friday the 13th! Hugs

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  21. Oh dear, poor you, such a lot of stress, do hope your knee soon feel better. At least you can safely say you have tried your very best with your situation and that others now know this too. Hopefully they will rally round now too. xcx

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  22. It's a start. Sounds like you've done what you can for now. Baby steps ... eventually even the Man will come to realize he needs extra help. Hard for anyone to admit that, even when there isn't a medical condition involved. Hope your knee heals up quickly.

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  23. As the song goes ... things can only get better ... can't they? Good wishes from this corner of the country ... and I hope your knee gets better soon.
    Margaret P

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  24. Those type of meetings make me so nervous, at least they are all aware of the real state of things, even if they are not completely on board. I am so sorry your Friday was such a mess, hope you are loving the new fridge and your knee is getting better.
    Hugs,
    Meredith

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  25. You were right to let that fridge go. No use throwing good money after bad as fixing it would only prolong the replacement and newer fridges work better. Sounds like your 13th was eventful, and not in a good way. Hopefully that's all the bad luck you'll get this year.

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  26. Oh dear what a palaver, poor you I hope your knee feels better soon. Having the meeting at all sounds like a big step forward. It probably takes a while for things to sink in.x

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  27. Hope your knee is okay Amy x

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  28. You certainly did have your fair share of bad luck on Friday but glad the fridge got sorted out quickly, it's so annoying having an appliance which isn't working properly. What a shame that Man was still being as stubborn at the meeting, but at least it all went well with the rest of the family and you were all singing from the same hymn sheet.

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  29. Bum, sending you good vibes though. I backed into dads gate post on Friday!!! Knee sounds pretty painful, rest up. Jo x

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  30. Wow Amy, hope you feel better soon! And, be glad your meeting with Man was not on Friday!

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  31. I am so glad that the anticipation was worse than reality - well a more accurate way is to say I'm glad the reality wasn't as bad as feared (I'm not glad that the anticipation has worried you so much). Maybe as changes occur Man will let a little more happen each time, maybe. x

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  32. Hi Amy, I am so sorry to hear about your Friday the 13th, I hope your knee heals quickly. That is too bad about your fridge, that's always a large expense. I hope things get better with dealing with Man's issues. I'm sure it's tough. Enjoy the week and I hope all goes well.

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  33. What a trying time you've had! Glad you got the fridge replaced. It was good of you to go ahead with the meeting when you had had such a nasty tumble and injury to your knee, but then it was important to get together for the discussion. It may seem little has been achieved because of your relative's attitude, but on the other hand family members are now more aware and agree he needs help and you know that you've done your best. I hope you can now relax a little and rest up that knee so that it heals quickly.xL

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  34. Oh Amy, that's a rough day indeed. Great to get a new fridge so quickly though. I had to wait about two weeks for a new washing machine! And I've been without a fridge for ages as well in the past. Fortunately in the winter when the food could be put outside in the cold. In fact it was so cold it all froze. I hope your knee is better soon, it sounds really painful. Good there is a tiny bit of positive action in respect of Man, even if it's not much. I hope things will progress more soon. I'm wishing you a good week this week, hopefully no more disasters - I think you have got them all out of the way now! CJ xx

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  35. What a Friday! I hope your knee is feeling better. Often fridges cost more to repair than what it's worth, so a new one is not necessarily profligate. Glad the family meeting went reasonably well - you've certainly done what you could.

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  36. What a good job Friday 13th is behind you I'm now in Monday 16th and its looking to be a good one - here's to a great new week ahead of you, with all your troubles behind you. Hopefully your knee is on the mend too!
    Wren x

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  37. Dear Amy,

    So sorry you had one of those days and glad you have your new fridge.
    Hope your knee is feeling better.
    Take it easy and hope you have a great new week.
    Hugs
    Carolyn

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  38. I know how awful it is to fall and hurt your knee - it happened to me a few weeks ago and I'm convinced I've done some damage to the bone. I also managed to cut it open at the same time.
    Friday the 13th went by reasonably uneventfully here. I am very superstitious though and am always saluting magpies.
    Hope this week's better for you.
    S x

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  39. Its a start Amy and now with the family on side he can at least be monitored. Hope you feel better soon and that it is just rest that your knee needs. Take care.

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  40. Oh dear, Amy, what a horrid day. I hope your knee is feeling better. Good that there has been a little bit of progress on the Man front, at least you are not shouldering the load alone. Wishing You a better week ahead. xx

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  41. Oh My Fur & Whiskers!!!! You have had so many challenges at once. Thankfully it is now Monday . . the weekend is behind us and . . well, for now, your knees would ask you to dream big - BUT, continue to rest . . (just guessing - please take care of yourself - knees are important) ya know, I feel as if we are one family of loving support - I think of people - blogging chums - all the time . . . love & love, -g-

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  42. Oh Amy! They say everything comes at once and in your case, 'they' were right (whoever 'they' are). Hope that knee gets better soon. Hugs xx

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